It comes as no surprise that a day created solely around love, couples, and pre-set menus for two isn’t easy to handle when you’re single, even more so during a pandemic. But that doesn’t mean February 14th has to be a day you hide under your blanket and ignore the outside world (even more than you already do).
You might be experiencing some negative feelings around this day; jealousy, loneliness, anxiety, and shame, to name a few. But what if I told you those feelings are simply feelings? That you don’t have to ride the wave of Valentine’s Day feeling sad and jaded?
How you choose to navigate February 14th is in your own hands. In fact, I’d go as far as to say that this day is all the more reason for you to take care of yourself, invest in what makes you happy, and remember a few realities about your singledom.
If you’re confused about what you should (or shouldn’t) do on Covid Valentine’s Day, that’s totally OK. I have you covered with several tips, ideas, and reminders that will take you from dreading this day to feeling excited about it:
Stay off dating apps.
First off, let’s get one thing clear: being on dating apps during Valentine’s Day isn’t the best idea. You can swipe any other day but, on this particular day, it’s best to stay off them.
The chance of you experiencing the very real dating fatigue or hopelessness from seeing a bunch of guys who aren’t what you’re looking for is exponentially higher on this day. It’s better to remove yourself from that environment and spend your time doing something more productive.
Besides, you could probably use a dating app break. If there were ever a day to take one, Valentine’s Day is that day.
Plan a Galentine's Day.
Have you heard of Galentine’s Day? If not, you’re going to be glad you have now. Essentially, Galentine’s Day is when a group of friends throws a party celebrating their friendship. It’s typically done the day before Valentine’s Day, but if you have a group of single friends, you could all benefit from throwing it on the 14th.
Since seeing each other in-person isn’t recommended right now, a virtual Galentine’s Day is the answer. There’s a lot of options you can have everyone do, too, like:
- Have everyone buy the same wine beforehand and do a tasting.
- Do a game night with online games like JackBox or Among Us.
- Plan a movie night via Netflix Party.
- Make your favorite cocktails and share what they are.
- Plan a red and pink theme, dress code included.
Use this day to invest in your future.
Being single can take a toll on your confidence. It’s not easy getting rejected after a first date that you thought went well or being ghosted by someone who couldn’t send a simple text message to tell you they’re not interested.
One way to build your confidence back up is by taking Valentine’s Day off from how you typically spend your weeknights and using that time to plan some life goals. Nothing says you love yourself by making plans for life changes you’re proud of.
That could look like journaling or finding out how you can see a therapist within your budget. Maybe you’d want to research schools or programs to learn a new skill. Or perhaps it’s simply reading a book on a subject you love.
Whatever you choose, spending time to map out your goals will help take your mind off everything going on with Valentine’s Day, plus you’ll feel proud after.
Avoid social media.
Single or not, every person is better off avoiding social media on Valentine’s Day. Social media has a not-so-cute reputation for people making their lives seem a lot better than they are. If you’re not careful, you might fall into the trap of comparing your life to someone else’s.
Because sure, someone may have posted an adorable photo of them and their boyfriend kissing. But what they didn’t show was the hundreds of other photos it took to get that Insta-worthy photo. Or the big argument they had just last week.
Honestly, you’re better off not looking at any of that. If you can’t resist the urge to sneak a peek at what everyone is doing, delete your apps. The photos will still be there tomorrow. Look out for your mental well-being on the 14th.
Treat yourself to flowers, candies, and a gift.
Do you wish someone would buy you a gift or flowers to adorn your coffee table with? Well, the good news is, someone can! That person is you.
There’s no reason to wait around for someone else to buy you what you want. Treat yourself to little things that make you happy, whenever you want. But, if you feel like you need more reason to, I’d say Valentine’s day is the perfect reason.
Go to your nearest florist or grocery store (support local! and buy yourself your favorite flowers. Pick up some delicious candy on the way home, and buy yourself that present you’ve been eyeing for some time. You don’t need someone else to buy you gifts for you to deserve them. Making yourself feel special on Valentine’s Day is the ultimate act of self-care.
A few reminders if you’re feeling down:
- Your relationship status does not define you. The most exciting thing about you isn’t that you’re not in a relationship. You have plenty of great qualities; make sure to remember those.
- Being alone doesn’t mean you’re unlovable. You can’t rush love; it comes on its own time. Just because you’re single now doesn’t mean you’ll always be.
- Any negative feelings will go as quickly as they came. Sometimes emotions feel like they’re apart of us, but I promise that’s not the case. If you’re feeling down, doing an activity, like the ones I described above, or thinking about something else will help the feeling pass.
- You’re better off being single than settling, which a lot of people do. You may think everyone is happy, and you’re missing out, but you don’t know what goes on behind closed doors. At the very least, you’re not in a relationship that makes you feel miserable or unfulfilled.
- Your expectations won’t be disappointed. Way too many people think their Valentine’s Day needs to be grand and romantic, but they end up setting their expectations too high. Rest assured that you won’t be feeling underwhelmed at the end of the night (or fighting, count your blessings).
- Remember that Valentine’s Day is just another day. It only has meaning because people choose to give it meaning. But when it comes down to it, February 14th is a day like any other.